Beauty Mark

I have a jillion stories, Truths and tears from the last week alone. I needed to take a breath and to take a hot bath. So I took a little mountain drive and crossed the border into Swaziland for the night to soak up some beauty and have enough time for storytelling. Because you’re really important to me.

Mama Charity’s house is coming along BEAUTIFULLY.

I’ve been in a discipling relationship with Mama Charity for over two years. Our relationship has a storm-weathered, real-love foundation.

As the walls of Mama Charity’s home are being built up, we are primed and ready to build her up, teaching her who she is in Christ and what Home really is.

We’re not withholding anything.

We’re being intentional, implementing new ideas, and taking family to the next level at Ten Thousand Homes this year. (It’s January 24 and already been so intense I had to remove myself from the country… that’s how you know it’s gonna be good, people.)

Mama Charity signed a contract for her house, committing to home-building like family, to be all-in and completely open. Mama Charity has “jobs” on the construction site and has committed to being our first participant in the Ten Thousand Homes Family Skills Class. (We’re creating curriculum as we go. I’m absolutely in my happy place as I get to reach deeper into my love of counseling, teaching and her!)

Lizzy, whose house we built last year, is co-teaching with me. Not only is she making God’s Truth and practical life skills culturally relevant, but there is an AMAZING sisterhood springing forth and encouraging them both.

Last week, instead of Sunday Lunch, I asked Lizzy if I could bring breakfast to her house, and we could all go to church together. Usually, I pick up Busi, whose home we built in 2011, and Mama Charity from their community named Dwaleni, and we travel to the neighboring community (where Lizzy and her family live)  for church. Busi had never met Lizzy, whose home we built in 2013.

As we sat in Lizzy’s beautiful new home with fancy oats and fruit salad, I was struck by what was happening around me, by who was around me…

Busi has been on her own, the head of her household, since she was 12-years old. Last year she learned how to hear God’s voice. This year she gained hope for her future and decided to go back to school – a 20-year old with a child in 10^th grade – and she’s incredibly committed.

Busi at her former house - August 2011

Busi - December 2013

Lizzy’s house and everything she owned in this world burned down in March 2013. Her husband had been laid off from work, and they were living out of a tent. We were able to not only build her home, but welcome her hard-working husband onto our full-time construction crew. My church in Texas came in June and stocked the home with beautiful furniture. We saw ashes turn into beauty in just a few months. And now Lizzy is paying it forward by caring for her neighbors and selflessly giving her time to teach a class with me.

Mama Charity has been covered in shame and abuse her entire life, hating herself because her father – and every guy she tried to fill her emptiness with – rejected her. Now she hears God’s voice, and He has given her a new name. This week Mama Charity told me her new name is Prayer, because her Father hears her when she speaks to him.

I was sitting in the room with the Hope and Home VIPs!

Truth: It’s still really messy around here. There are many, many giants to slay in their lives and in mine, but that won’t stop in this lifetime. We backslide. We break. And I so easily shed shortsighted tears.

What matters is that women have been transformed and are being transformed by Home.

I couldn’t hold back celebrating it with them. I told them that they have a responsibility as Home-owners to stick together and help each other walk through life. They can relate to one another on levels I cannot, and they now have Truth to hold onto and speak out.

I told them they are part of our TTH family, and we will stick together, loving each other and our neighbors who need help. They beamed.

I could see a unique sisterhood forming fast, so I slipped outside to watch the children reject my fancy oats in the name of lame cornflakes. Even they were forming fast oats-dissing friendships. It’s like they knew it too that they are part of an extra-special family.

 With hands full of dishes, I walked back inside to check on the ladies. The house had been transformed into a makeover show! They were doing each other’s makeup, changing clothes, fixing their hair, passing a mirror around and giggling like crazy. It was like the best Sunday morning slumber party ever.

As soon as I pulled out my camera, Mama Charity struck a pose. It was like it was more natural to pop out that hip and work it than it was to blink!

And I realized everything was different now.

She’s never looked like that. She’s never radiated the way she was radiating.

Beauty Himself was shining out from under of that fresh coat of makeup. 

She’d never had family. She’d never experienced this kind of embrace in her own culture with other young moms who could relate to her.

She looked gorgeous. She felt gorgeous.

Then everybody needed to pose. Obv.

Esther saw my car parked at Lizzy’s and showed up with a feeble, fearful smile and three babies tied to her little body.

Esther’s been kicked out of her home by her alcoholic husband, has been rejected by her family, and her 7-month old is in grave danger of malnutrition. Sweet, insecure Esther quietly sat on the couch while the home-owning beauty queens struck poses. And those newly made over beauties welcomed Esther in with all the beauty that God welcomes us into His Family with.

Esther just sat amongst Busi, Mama Charity and Lizzy and soaked in some of the joy dripping off of them.

This was when the made-over mamas decided they wanted to walk their
beautiful selves to church. They left Esther and I with all TWELVE children
for a very noisy car ride to church! (In case you're wondering: my car
technically seats 7. But they're just such small people.) 

The contrast in smiles and confidence was undeniable. There was light and love in the eyes of the women who’ve experienced family from around the world, from people like you who are willing to sacrifice to give them home. There was fear and insecurity in Esther who cannot begin to fathom family.

The makeup and the smiles said it all.

Through a home and the people who made it possible, Busi, Lizzy and Mama Charity have been marked by Beauty. This week, I got to see that beauty spreading.

Yes, there was devastation along the way. There was a starving baby and a lost, hopeless mother.

Yet in a community contaminated with sickness, darkness, and poverty, there are three united women marked by Beauty. And now they are ready to show it off  and give it away.

And just one Beauty mark is enough to change everything.

Thank you for being a part of Beauty’s mark.

“Yet I am writing you a new command; its truth is seen in him and you, because the darkness is passing and the true light is already shining.” 1 John 1:8 

***Update: On the one day I was out of cell phone and internet's reach, Esther's youngest baby was hospitalized for malnutrition. As I return from Swaziland to post the blog I wrote and start preparing Sunday Lunch, I found out that Esther left her twin babies with Lizzy with no food, clothing or word about when she would come back. Esther seems to be in the deepest pit of hopelessness. Please pray for the greatest good for this family. 

What Wednesday Looked Like

It's not that there's some super-sneaky-supernatural-better-than-there beauty about South Africa and these children. Don't get me wrong, I think they're among the most precious and perfect in the world. But it's that sometimes we look for that faraway, extra intense, poverty-level kind of glory. 

These are my Wednesday afternoons. Sweaty, dirty, there's-frog-poop-in-my-house, and the-water's-not-working-again Wednesdays. And it's just as easy for me to see my Wednesday afternoon like you see yours in whatever you do on Wednesday afternoons. So I prayed that, as we opened up for our first feeding of the year this Wednesday, I would see Wednesday the way He does. And see them the way He does. And LOOK at what I saw. (Please at least watch the video at the end... it's worth it.)

I pray for your Wednesdays too. And for your todays and tomorrows. And that we see with heaven's eyes - the ones that will be wiped tear-free and beholding perfect glory for eternity. 

Don't judge me...

What I Didn't Know Four Years Ago

It’s that time of the year where we rev-up, remember and dream big.

At Ten Thousand Homes, we’ve been looking back and everything that happened last year, all that was “accomplished”, and can see the miracles God did in retrospect. We are just a weeeee-little group of full-time staff. We could not have done all that was done by our own strength.

We may not be able to physically see God, but in the numbers, the photos, the smiles, the homes, and the strong-standing relationships, He’s tangibly real.

(Click here for a photo review of the year!)

Today is a day that always causes me to look back. I didn’t know what I was stepping into when I stepped onto a plane four years ago. FOUR YEARS!

I don’t know what I’m stepping into today as we seek God for and start running into 2014. So I learn in retrospect and I lean in hope.

January 12, 2010 was one of the CRAZIEST days of all of my 29 years. I was going on a “trip” to South Africa.

I’d been up half the night before packing between “WHAT AM I DOING!?!” texts and bites of that one last Chinese binge.

The next morning, at the foot of my cousins’ stairs, I FRANTICALLY weighed, packed, unpacked. The extra towel, the vitamin C and assorted other treasures just wouldn’t make the cut… I was sweating and on the verge of losing it. (Probably didn’t have all that much to do with luggage tags and weight.)

And then my ride came. My lifelong best friend with her mom and brand-new adopted baby, as well as my best friend from college who’d taken the day off on her anniversary (HAPPY ANNIVERSARY JARED AND MELISSA!) to send me off.

I had to say goodbye to my family to get in the car with my friends. Tears flow even now when I remember those hugs… and practically slamming the door in NaNa’s face because I couldn’t let her see me break. While luggage was flying and I struggled to keep myself together, I remember her saying, “This is what it’s like when you’re getting ready for a wedding. You’re just going on your honeymoon with Jesus.”

I cry-called my mom in California to say goodbye. I cried to the AT&T lady as I canceled my phone service.

And then there was the airport. EVERYTHING that could have gone wrong DID. Luggage was rolling in the middle of busy roads. We had no idea where we were going. It’s apparently frowned upon to enter a country without a visa and with a one-way ticket. So much chaos, and so much laughter. I was with the PERFECT people for that misadventure. The pain of leaving dissolved with laughter and memories that still make me smile.

I never came back from that trip. Now I go on trips to see those people I love so deeply.

I didn’t know what kind of goodbye I was saying that day. I had no idea that my Beloved was carrying me across the threshold of that airplane to live with Him in a new way and in a new place.

I didn’t know that the sweet, adopted baby I kissed and the forever friends-turned-family I was squeezing at Intercontinental Airport in Houston, Texas were releasing me to kiss more precious, adopted-by-the-Father babies and make more forever friends-turned-family. 

On January 12, 2010, I didn’t know about covenant love that doesn’t require birth certificates or anything binding because Family lasts long after documents, diseases and this earth passes away.

I didn’t know about finding joy and hope in suffering – in broken homes, hospital visits and throughout a land ravaged by HIV.

I didn’t know about the strength of the Body of Christ – a church that loves me for real all the way from Texas, people who come and spend themselves for people they’ve just met, and a local church that doesn’t give up.

I didn’t know that I could never grasp the full love of the Father, but I could get a lot deeper in it with dirty hands and a broken heart.

I didn’t know that I would still be leaving Texas airports with tears every year, still balancing frustrations of multi-cultural living, still in over my head with things that I don’t know four years later… 

And that it would all be worth it.

Please look at what I have my hands full of.

What I know today is that if I did know (and I mean really, really know) all of that when my alarm clock went off on January 12, 2010, I would not have even walked down those stairs. I wouldn’t have had the faith, the strength, or the endurance.

One day, one step at a time. I’m still walking into I-don’t-knows, and it’s still hard.

But every toe pointed toward His I-don’t-knows leads you toward sovereignty and the freedom of following the Father, one step at a time. The kind of freedom-stepping that leads to dance parties and joy when it doesn’t make sense.

You may not dance every day. But on the days you do, it’s good.

This is my pep talk for both of us.

When your feet hit the floor in January 12, 2014, you might not be heading downstairs to pack, repack, and start a journey around the world. But you’re stepping into something that’s been planned by True Love himself since the very beginning. There’s intentional love woven into unknowns, tears and laughter. Maybe even miracles, whether you see them in retrospect, in real-time, or choose one that’s already been paid for - like forgiving someone as you’ve been forgiven.

At the beginning of 2014, I don’t know anything except that He is good, and He works for the good of those who love Him.

We just have to take one step at a time toward Him.

2014: The Year of Pizza and Noodles

On New Year’s Eve-Eve (December 30^th), I learned that Lifa does not know the English word for “throw-up”, or any other time of human body projection for that matter. It was a 2am lesson learned with all five senses and everybody’s gag reflexes fully engaged.

I’ll spare you any further details... Let’s just say it was a long night.

On New Year’s Eve, I laid that sweet, recovering boy down at 7:30pm and wondered what to do with my attitude, my perspective and my evening on my very first ever New Year’s alone.

I tried my hardest not to let thoughts sway in the direction of feeling lame or lonely.

It ended up being a just-right kind of night. I put my headphones in so I couldn’t hear crawling creature sounds, the party music from the neighboring communities and Lifa’s snores; I busted out the fancy dark chocolate; and I let my Savior set the tone and pour His Truth over me for 2014. Afterward, I reminded myself that I AM NOT LAME for flicking off the lamp at 11:53pm.

The peaceful, tone-setting, Truth-writing way 2013 ended was not exactly how the wee-hours of 2014 began.

The first screeching home alarm jarred me out of bed at 1:30am, and it was only the beginning. We had some major security issues last night. From 3:00 -5:30am, I stood guard from within the safety of my security bars while a hired security guard stood outside of my house.

Most important fact: WE’RE ALL OK!

And, in truth, I started 2014 with my TTH family around me for an unexpected gathering and a team of prayer warriors in America lifting us up.

At 6:30am, Lifa bounded onto my bed actually saying, “Mama! It’s a great day! I slept so well!” 

WHAT KIND OF SIX-YEAR OLD SAYS THAT!?! 

I whined that I was tired. 

He suggested closing my eyes next time it’s time to sleep. Good one, Lifa.

But in those morning hours I realized that the shaking of my heart and state-of-mind were very real all night long. They were also in direct opposition to the Truth of my God the fortress and His unshakable Kingdom.

In the very moments the calendar was turning, I had to choose what I would turn to.

Before I went to bed on New Year's Eve, I hung up 2014’s promise on my wall:

“Yet I am writing you a new command: its truth is seen in him and you, because the darkness is passing and the true light is already shining.” 1 John 2:8

I will not give the first breath of 2014 to fear. Perfect love casts out fear.

Darkness flees as soon as Light shows up.

No thief can steal my joy. It doesn’t come from this world.

Still, I needed to do something with my heart. Even more than I need this fortress of steel bars, I need one of thanksgiving and praise. I needed to walk in the opposite spirit of what the dark night was saturated with.

We enter His courts with thanksgiving and his gates with praise.

So Lifa and I made a banner of thanksgiving for the gifts God had given us in 2013. We let colors run wild and thankfulness abound. Creativity flowed and hope rose. Even my exhaustion got washed away.

Lifa giggled and danced as we read over and hung up all the things we are thankful for. We decided to start 2014 by giving our Maker a gift since He’s given us so many good gifts.

I asked Lifa what he wanted to give to Jesus this year. First he said pizza… but then we determined that’s what he wanted this year. Finally, he decided to write Jesus a storybook.

He dictated.

I wrote.

He illustrated.

It was so sweet, so genuine, I could hardly stand it.

All the darkness of last night truly did pass as Light flowed from Lifa’s eyes as the words from his heart came to his mouth. A few times he had to stand up and dance out his emotions as he screamed, “I’M SO GOOD AT THIS! JESUS IS GOING TO LOVE IT!”

There’s a video of Lifa’s play-by-play of the book he made, but, just in case you don’t have 6 minutes to spare, here’s what he wrote.

A Story for Jesus.

For: Jesus. By: Lifa.

Jesus, I love you.

God the Father, I want to be with you.

Holy Spirit, I miss you.

I want to give you a kiss!

I want to give you a hug!

Thank you for giving me paint.

Thank you for my mom being a good mama.

I want to give you some pizza and noodles. And Sprite.

The end.

The best part was watching his joy bubble over as he illustrated. And then when we watched the video together, he followed along cheering and chattering with himself. So much genuine joy. In the most simple and sincere gift-giving.

The one who comes to steal, kill and destroy tried to steel up 2014 in a prison of fear. The One who comes so that I may have abundant life came to release the captives and set the prisoners free.

The rest of the day was filled with Spiderman slip-and-sliding and making our own (delicious) pizza and ice cream. Lifa couldn’t stop talking and dancing and shouting about how great the day was. And I couldn’t stop smiling, agreeing and thanking God for the first day of 2014. It aligned so perfectly with His promise.

“Yet I am writing you a new command: its truth is seen in him and you, because the darkness is passing and the true light is already shining.” 1 John 2:8

Let His true light be seen in me this year in all circumstances. Darkness is passing. He’s already shining.

Now go have some pizza and noodles, Jesus.