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My blog is called “Known”.

You and I are called “Known.”

And I’m learning now (again) that it takes some work to be known amongst your people. It takes an invitation…

You’re my people. And, beyond kissy pictures and cross-cultural storytelling, I want to invite you in to one of the most intimate parts of my journey in Africa right now.

A little boy… 

Lifa is a three-year old who was abandoned by his biological parents very early on. When I met him in March, he was being raised in a nearby community, Mbonisweni, where I work and attend church.

Lifa lived with a family, but never grasped – was never taught – his inherent value. His lifeless body and dull eyes made him almost invisible to his community. We connected instantly.

I’m compelled to be in Africa working with the orphaned and vulnerable children because I identify with the “orphan cry” in them – to be known, to be loved and to belong.

We all do.

Being known, being loved and belonging starts in our families. That’s the design.

Lifa became my sidekick at every feeding program and filled my lap and my hands every church service or moment I could steal away to the house he lived in. It started as a joke amongst the women in the community – I was always kissing on that little boy and pouring every ounce of my affection into him, which is bizarre in this SiSwati-speaking culture.

He never spoke. He never smiled. He never played. And he couldn’t have given a snail a run for its money.

Lifa in August 2010
Photo by Carly B

But I just kept coming back. I would show up for church on Sunday mornings to his house, bathe him, dress him and take him to nap on my shoulder while I worshipped.

Eventually, he started coming over to stay at my house.

Then everything changed.

Lifa started speaking for the first time. He started playing, first with me and then with other children. He started laughing and experiencing the security of love. He started calling my house “home”.

Photo by Carly B

Lifa with "Sesi Rae" playing in my cottage.

Lifa’s lifeless body filled with life, and his dull eyes were replaced with light. Life and Light. That’s who Jesus is.

Lifa's happy eyes - and ice cream! Nov 2010

 And that’s Who changed everything in this boy He looks at and says, “You are My Greatness, Lifa.”

Lifa is who Jesus calls “the least of these”. Abandoned and invisible to all… The exact kind of guy Jesus hangs out with.

Through his transformation, “the least of these” is transforming his entire community. They see Light and Life and want it. They see that maybe there is something to loving like the family God called us to live in. They see that maybe there’s more than surviving day to day. Maybe there’s really abundant life.

No one laughs at me and Lifa’s excessive kissing and hugging anymore. Now they call me Lifa’s Mama. And now they’ve asked me to spend the next year in the church teaching them how to do family God’s way. An undeserved platform to speak Truth, Promises, Hope and Home into a community that has welcomed me in as a mother and a sister rather than an American missionary.

When I left for a two-month trip to the States, Lifa’s father – a stranger to Lifa – came and picked him up from the family Lifa was living with. We had no idea where he went, if he was safe or why he was gone. I called and I called.

And I started grieving like a mother who lost her child.

It was an incredible joy for me to be reunited with family and friends for the first time in a year in the States, but part of me felt broken and missing. Homesick.

Here’s the part I really need you in on. You still hanging in? I know, I’m wordy.

Last year was a year of not expecting to become a missionary, being surprised and feeling out of my element.

This year is a year to intentionally walk in the calling He’s put on me.

He calls me His Ambassador for Family.

This year is a year to expand the Family of God and to speak out Truth and Promises.

Lifa’s still not back and we’re running into cultural red tape like you wouldn’t believe. An unsure and intimidated father, language barriers, costs of communication, unclear perceptions and no information on how to get to him. I haven’t seen him in 2 ½ months.

But I want you to know and to believe with me that Lifa is part of my story. And always will be.

We won’t stop. We won’t give up.

I’ve been squirming in discomfort and groaning in pain since I’ve arrived and not known how to proceed through finding Lifa and seeking God’s best for his life.

Finally, with help, prayer and people beating down the door of the cozy cottage I tried to hide in, my family is in on this. I’ve shared with the Ten Thousand Homes staff the promises I feel God has called me to – I believe I will adopt Lifa.

They are praying with me, standing with me and believing with me.

The pastor of mine and Lifa’s church, Pastor Sthembiso has contacted his father and explained that I would like to come and greet Lifa (who is currently staying with a granny about 1 hour away) and bring him gifts. We want to do this family-style… not ripping a child away from a biological parent, but ensuring he is safe and has an opportunity to dream, to receive a good education and to experience his value in God and in family.

Lifa’s father agreed to letting me come greet Lifa at the granny’s. The father is not there, and is working about 5 hours away. (Pastor expressed relief and that he was probably much safer to be staying with a granny.) Lifa’s father asked Pastor to call him back to get the granny’s number and info, and now he is not answering the phone. This is kind of how the process has been so far.

But there’s a big, big plan in this.

Don’t get me wrong, every day and every step has been showered with tears, emotional back flips and prayers… but also with God’s revelation that He’s doing family in the BIG picture right now. Already, he’s rallying up the Ten Thousand Homes family to pray and believe together. I’m asking you to do this with me right now. And I had a divine and incredible moment of praying with my African family, the family Lifa stayed with before, this Sunday morning, where we cried and interceded for Lifa together.

Photo by Carly B

He’s bringing families together through Lifa, the one He calls His Greatness. He’s got big plans in this journey for me to learn family – to hear God’s voice of Truth and Promises in that orphan cry. In my own heart, in Lifa’s and in Mbonisweni’s.

I believe that, through strengthening families, we will end the orphan crisis in Mbonisweni. Lifa is one of the most precious and intimate details in one of the most beautiful pictures of His Glory that God has ever painted.

Pray with me now for increased faith, patience and that I continue to walk this out the way God is calling me to… to live a life worthy of the gospel (Phil 1:27) and to do this for family and as family.

Please keep interceding faithfully for Lifa – that he is safe, experiencing the tangible love of Christ supernaturally, not feeling abandoned or forgotten, and that he comes home soon.

You’re invited.

Please accept the invitation. 

Hide and Speak

Hey, stop reading my journal!

Ok fine… I posted it. PLEASE read it.

I’m inviting you in to my conversation with God today.

I’m asking You to do this with me and be accountable in my life and your own for what I’m praying for. Here we go...

Sometimes I feel like a child.

Like my faith is completely lacking. Like I don’t believe in what You say and what You’ll do. You even tell other people who speak truth and wisdom to me, and I’m still afraid.

But that’s not a child at all. You told us to be more like children. Because they believe without question. They expect the biggest, the boldest and the best…. Until something breaks.

It’s that moment of realizing your parents aren’t perfect. Or when it suddenly becomes about something more than you. It’s when you realize you may not be completely safe or completely protected all the time. Bad things really can happen.

That’s when doubt creeps in. That’s when we realize we’re naked before that one bite of rotten fruit even digested.

Exposed without protection from the elements. Vulnerable with no promise of security on earth.

That’s when, instead of thinking about rainbow-sized promises and the infinite majesties of the Creator, we start thinking of the ways we don’t measure up and start reaching for an invisibility cloak rather than the belt of truth, the breastplate of righteousness, the helmet of salvation, the shield of faith and the sword of the spirit (Ephesians 6:10-17).  

At least that’s what I do.

Hiding in the bushes while You’re walking through the garden looking for me.

You know where I am. Yet You’re calling out to me, longing for me to come to You. You knew all of me before I did. Why do I feel like I have to hide?

Shadows, bushes and valleys.

Or light, gardens and mountaintops.

Wherever we are, You’re still calling out.

The only thing that ever stays the same is You.

I’m in Africa. That’s on purpose. You said to come.

I don’t want to hide in the bushes while I’m here. (There are snakes!)

You’ve said over and over again that this is a year for Truth and Promises. It’s a year to speak them out wherever I am, to live by them and to believe in them more than I believe in all that rotten fruit, nudey pants stuff.

I do. And I will.

You’ve also said it’s necessary this year… in a this-might-hurt kind of way. You have big plans to expand my ministry. I don’t want to be the one who limits You. You don’t need me to do Your work, and it’s an honor to be invited into the story of Your Glory.

I believe in You. I believe in what You say.

I know You and You know me.

The only hiding I want to do is when You call me to come away for a Beloved getaway with My Maker.

I need help. I need MORE of You. Speak Your Truths and Promises to me, and I will speak them out wherever I go.

I promise.

There you have it, friends and family… Truth and Promises Year

It’s a lofty calling, not as exciting and cheerleader-ish as it sounds.

In fact… Can we start this now?

If you’re reading this now (ahem… you are), if a Truth or a Promise came to mind, or if God has spoken one to you lately… or ever… post it as a comment on my blog.

Let’s start speaking out His Truth now. Let’s proclaim His Promises and see how it feels to brag about Who He Is. Let’s set our sites on The Way, The Truth and The Life and we won’t be able to stay hidden. We’ll be those kids in the hide-and-seek game who run out to find the seeker because it feels so good to be found. To be known. To be in the light instead of the dark.

Let’s do it.

Start now.

Sleepless in South Africa... We're back.

I’m back in Africa!

I’ve never been so happy to be here in my perfect cottage, set right in the middle of my African family, their homes and the Ten Thousand Homes base. 

It’s never felt so good – or  been so exciting! - to ride down that bumpy dirt road on Plot 177, Plaston Road.

Thank you for your prayers as we traveled back. Carly B and I arrived safely (and slightly delirious) after two days of traveling. We felt your prayers and God’s provision all the way. We even had the row to ourselves on both flights!

And not to worry everyone – Carly B is already getting the full picture of life in South Africa. And I’m having my first “Welcome Home” experience here.

Let’s paint a picture, shall we? Please, get another cup of coffee… or whatever it is you’re drinking. You’re going to love this.

Keri Dodge and Lynn picked us up from the airport, we loaded up our 2 bajillion pounds of luggage, stocked up on water and electrolytes and headed out for the breathtakingly beautiful four-hour road trip.

I think this picture-painting will switch to a list format so we can have a numerical account of life as we know it… back in Africa!

1. We pulled into the driveway to find the ultimate welcome – Carla Shaw demonstrating the body roll. Nothing says welcome home like the body roll.

2. HUGS all around… and those beautiful Price children to kiss and kiss and kiss!

3. Cottage time! Carly B opens the door to find a “Welcome Home Carly B” sign posted and I’m dancing around when I see that Zach installed my new ceiling fan while I was gone.

4. Then…. Cue dramatic music.

5. We find out that the fridge got turned off somehow during the last two months and my condiment and butter supply turned into a mold farm.

6. This is about when the gagging started.

7. And then we hear the story of the dead mouse. But don’t worry, he didn’t die from starvation.

8. We decide to bypass the smell of mold and dead rodent for ladies night at Lynn’s house. After all, it’s rude to miss ladies night. And there are TWO new families living on base since I left. New ladies to get to know.

9. A home-cooked meal, good laughs, tasty snacks and delicious muffins with incredible ladies under the perfect starry night. Ahhh, redemption.

10. And, oh yeah, we had to show Lindsey the body roll.

11. After all the excitement, the sleepy travelers needed ni-night time… Alas! We’ve locked ourselves out of Lynn’s! We won’t go into details, but there was one Carly B leg and one Carla Shaw leg sticking through burglar bars… and a Keri Dodge climbing a balcony. We’re dealing with large rocky surfaces and moonlight only, people. Carla keeps finding new bruises and Carly B chipped her bright orange toenail polish. Life’s not always as glamorous as you might think here.

12. After one more forgetting-my-keys incident, we make it home safe and sound and are more than ready for a good-ish, jet-laggish night of sleep.

And now we’re in the present-tense… Day 1 in Africa.

Forgive me for not blogging instantly upon arrival, but maybe we should just start another list to fill you in on what today was like.

1. We “slept in”. (You can’t really sleep in here.)

2. Carly B puts on my paint pants and I’m still in the clothes I slept in… it’s go-time.

3. Refrigerator mold. Rat poop. Here we come!

4. Bonus round: a new ninja frog family.

5. There was girly screaming, giggling and a lot of sweaty cleaning.

6. Welcome to Africa, Carly B!
7. The highlights of the day, believe it or not, were not the frogs or the excessive bleaching (if I wasn’t white before, I am now!). It was the visitors!

8. We had visitors all throughout the day, catching us up on life, giving hugs and kisses (those were mostly from the small children), and helping us with some of the more rancid projects.

9. I might have gone to crazy-town once or twice.

10. But it felt like family.

So… there you have it. A look at a homecoming and an initiation. We’re not holding anything back! Carly B just finished an erratically-tempered shower and we’re ready to make dinner in my deeply-cleaned kitchen.

Please keep praying as I adjust back to my normal. Back to daily life. Back to home.

Although some of the parts feel so right, there are so many new and different parts. New families on base. New parts of me that I experienced through God and you while in the States. A new roommate (for a month) in the cottage. New teams coming next week. And a new year with new plans God has set in place already – plans for family, plans for Lifa and plans for speaking out His Truth and Promises.

I need your prayers. And I’m delighted to share everything from the day’s play-by-play to the deepest ways God is stirring in me and in Africa as we join together as family to bring the Kingdom to earth… Home on earth.

Thanks for being part of my Home on earth.

I love you and Welcome Home!

Happy Africa Day!!!

Homeward Bound!

I'm sitting on the floor of Intercontinental Airport in Houston with Carly B, counting down the minutes until Flight EK212 takes off! (94 minutes)

Look how excited we are!

We will leave Houston at 6:25pm for a 14 hour 40 minute flight to Dubai. We'll arrive around 9am Houston time. 

We have a layover in Dubai and will leave Dubai at 4:40am Dubai time/6:40pm Tuesday Houston time for an 8 hour 10 minute flight to Joburg, South Africa. 

We will arrive in South Africa at 10:50am South African time/2:50am Wednesday morning Houston time.

We'll be cross-eyed (I speak for myself) and ready to hug Keri Dodge who is picking us up to take us HOME to Ten Thousand Homes!

Please pray for us as we travel. 

Pray for health, safety and that ALL of our luggage makes it safely!

Updates to come! And.. I miss you already!

Journey Through the Knowns and Unknowns

I’ve been on an indescribable journey in the past two months…

Hopping hemispheres, crossing causeways, passing through peninsulas, sharing stories, and moments and meals with the most meaningful people.

The journey has been more than miles, more than meals, and more than any measure of alliteration could suffice for. I’ve shared my story over and over again, and have been surprised almost every time I open my mouth and hear God put HIS two cents in.

This week I am on a personal retreat- exchanging the speed of American life for island time. Just like last year, Shelley at the Hilton Galveston Island Resort gave me grace, a great deal and a warm welcome to stay for two nights right here on the seawall to take in the arctic breeze, salty scenery and rest in His inescapable beauty and presence on this island. She even remembered me and let me bring out all the Lifa pictures she could stand! (He’s invited next year.)

Yes. King-sized. You don't even have to get up to see the Gulf.

Pretty sure He picked these for me.

Monday evening, I’ll be settling down into seat K21 and starting a two-day journey back to Africa! FIVE DAYS TO GO!!! (but who’s counting?)

This time I’m going with a different perspective.

This time I’m going home.

This time I’m saying goodbye to my family and my friends to go back to my family and my friends.

This time I’m leaving my church home to go back to my church home.

This time I’m not making small talk on an airplane with strangers as we set out for a 5-month mission trip together (love you Bekah and Brittany!) but am going back home with Carly B, a part of my everyday life, whether we’re on the same continent or not.

In some ways it’s going to be more comfortable. Fewer uncertainties about details, faces and culture.

In some ways, it’s going to be so much more uncomfortable. The kind of uncomfortable that comes with walking in the Kingdom culture as you weave in and out of earthly cultures. The kind of uncomfortable that comes with knowing that God’s got a lot to say in the unknown… and embracing unknowing in a run-and-jump-with-two-feet kind of way that trusts He’s handling the landing. Like not flinching on the trust fall.

I’m saying a more permanent goodbye to the details, faces and culture that shaped me. I’m saying ok to God guiding me in the unknown now that, after one of my least graceful years yet, I’ve come to terms with some of the basic knowns:

I know where I’m supposed to live for now.

I know some of the basics in how to maneuver through life in South Africa.

I know that a little boy named Lifa is family.

I know that I get to have a voice about family in Lifa’s community, Mbonisweni.

I know that God has a big plan that He’s inviting me to be a part of, if I stop trying to figure out all the little “knowns” and let him be the Known in the unknowns.

Letting God do the big picture and the details, while living in a foreign country and being surrounded by nothing that really ever makes sense comes with feeling blind… or at least like I have tunnel vision. (Ok, so I do.)

But He, the Known, reminded me on this retreat about all the “known” encounters I’ve had with Him and that’s He’s never forsaken me. 

In fact, in every event and encounter, He only shows me He knows me more. 

See....

He gave me sweet time with the most important 7 year-old in my life to remind me that I'm known beyond age and time zones. 

Extra special bonding with my best friend, Morgan. We got to watch each other do our thing and have a unique ministry experience together.

Revisiting a very special school, an incredible group of kids and remembering stories of hope and restoration.

So many perfect coffee shop moments in the perfect chairs.

A happy NaNa!

Walking through Seattle with women from all walks of life. Who know me wherever I am.

Sweet cups of tea with sweet conversation.

And perfect story when I just needed a break from life.

Family time with the my best friends, whose new community welcomed me in as family.

Ferry rides. Beach time. It's where me and Jesus meet.