Lifa Update!

This guy should have his own blog! He's certainly worth more daunting, delighting and perfect love than I could ever manage to put into words. (I'd rather spend all my time holding him, hugging him, kissing him and playing with him than writing about him anyway.)

That's the Good News!!

MONDAY IS LIFA DAY!!!!

(waiting for the chair-bouncing, giggling and squealing to subside... Oh wait, was that just me?)

Here are the details. I want you to know them because we need your persevering prayers in every single step.

Prayer Point 1: Travel
Monday is a South African holiday, so it's a long weekend and my pastor will just be coming home that morning at 9am from a weekend wedding. Pastor Sthembiso is our SiSwati-speaking, culturally savvy, pastoral connection to Lifa's father - he's walking with me through this and the guy who knows how to get to where we're going.
- Pray that Pastor will actually make it back from the wedding at 9am real time Monday morning rather than "Africa time"... which would probably be after 3pm. 
- Pray for safety, divine conversation and God's presence during our 8+ hours in the car. And PRAISE GOD providing me with a safe, reliable car and for John Shaw for offering to drive us in it!

Prayer Point 2: Family
When we arrive to the community of Bethal, we will pick up Lifa (!!!!!) and his father and take them to meet the father's sister. This could be an incredible beginning of God starting a movement and opening up paths in our story. I'm so nervous though!
- Pray for my peace and that I cling to what God's promised rather than my own fears and insecurities.
- Pray that Lifa's auntie has an overwhelming experience of the love of God and the creative ways He provides families through our interaction. Pray that she feels loved, known and included in a part of a beautiful plan. 

Prayer Point 3: Time
Lifa's father said that we can discuss how long Lifa will stay once we get there. Again... nervous and almost afraid of this conversation. BUT, super-heroes John Shaw and Pastor Sthembiso are on our team. Just the kind of men we want in our family! They intend on setting a minimum of a 2-week stay because of the distance and time it takes in transport alone. I don't know what the father has in mind. I don't know if the sister is planning on weighing in on this decision. I don't know how they feel about any of this. AND my friends, Mona, Lindsay and Anda are coming in 2 1/2 weeks and I really, really, really, reallllly want them to meet Lifa.
- Pray for the conversation about how long Lifa can be at home. Pray for my pastor's words to be written and communicated by the Spirit of God rather than our own plans and desires.
- Pray for Lifa's father to feel like he and his sister have a voice, they are being respected, and they are being taken care of. 
- Pray for God's just-right timing and that Lifa is home long enough to get his sparkly back, to experience home and to know he is loved and belongs in our family. Pray for all of our peace on the timing of his stay - and that we would all be surprised with the outcome and God's sweet sovereignty flowing through it. 

Did I mention I'm nervous?

Nervous yet unspeakably grateful for the role you are playing. Your prayers. Your love. And the Truth you speak into me and for me.

Please keep interceding for Lifa, myself and Lifa's biological family. Keep praying for this family movement that God is directing like the most beautiful symphony. 

I can't wait to send you updates!
Thank you!

"Take my picture! I'm a princess!"

Zoe is a 3-year old who lives on base at Ten Thousand Homes with her parents, Zach and Anneke, and her sisters Arielle (4) and Charlotte (1). I LOVE visits with Zoe and her sisters, where princess dancing and putting on “lip stick” (chap stick… preferably “red” cherry) is always appropriate.

Zoe is at jussst the right age – Lifa-sized, extra-cuddly and the perfect little voice that I secretly wish she’d never grow out of. (Remember when YOU were 3, Lily???)

Lately, whenever Zoe sees me, she gets the biggest and most beautiful excited smile on her face and starts revving up those little legs for a long and dramatic run and leap into my arms. Patrick Swayze and Baby got nothin’ on us! Sometimes we even have to do it over and over again.

When this little princess showed up at my door on Easter morning with a little knock and big plans, I couldn’t help but think of the way God loves His children.

“You must take a picture of me Taaaccyyy. I’m a princess.”

She came over to be delighted in and daunted over. No problem here! So of course, I made her twirl as I took photos and told her how beautiful she is.

The running and jumping. The uncontrollable giggles that spring out at first sight of me… because of the running and jumping immediately following. The knock-knock-knock just to be seen and celebrated.

Children really do get it… Which, by the way, is not an original idea at all.

Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” (Matt 19:14)

I try to earn my way. I try to set my place at the Kingdom-sized dinner table.

And then I think of Zoe.

And Lifa.

I found out yesterday we are having some trouble finding a day for us to make the 4-hour drive to pick up Lifa to come home for a visit for a while. Just a calendar blip, not a shut-down or change of heart by anyone in anyway. But devastated is an understatement for how I felt... or feel, and it didn’t take long for the life and energy to run out of me and make the Easter party-pooper.

But, as I was snuggling up on some adopted Ethiopian 3- and 4-year olds (unashamed that I was using their hugs and storybooks as personal therapy), I kept thinking about how I love Lifa and how unquestionably loved these once-abandoned Ethiopian children felt as they showed off their Easter goodies and demanded all of our attention.

Lifa doesn’t ever have to do anything for me to love him as much as I love him. Every bump in the road on our story – and no matter how our story plays out – only surprises me at how much I can love him and that I can actually love him more and more every day.

He could never earn this kind of love.

He couldn’t do anything to make me love him more or less.

And although he is tiny, helpless and doesn’t necessarily “contribute” anything to the family…

He is a most precious and dearly loved part of my family and the Family of God.

No expectations. No requirements.

That’s the story of the Family of God. My place and yours. Already set. Already paid for. It only takes a knock-knock-knock, and let the twirling begin!

“So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.” Luke 11:9-10

Easter is just one day to remember an every day promise. The promise of our adoption into the perfect Family. The Family that loves without condition, that welcomes you with outstretched arms for that classically undignified run-and-jump routine, and that only loves you more and more each day no matter where you are or what you do.

I spent the afternoon with my family in Mbonisweni. I pulled up in a little blue Mazda full of treats, cupcakes to be decorated, nail polish, a camera charged for a photo shoot, and an art project. (What’s a party without a craft? Oh man… Africa has changed me.) As we each colored a family member, I explained what Easter was all about.

“You love me so perfectly and welcome me into your family. That’s what Easter is. Jesus didn’t die on a cross just so we could be free of sin. He chose to make us pure so that we could be adopted fully into His Family – with no cost to us. Easter is a family holiday. An adoption celebration.”

Today I’m celebrating my place in the Family, and the place of all of His children. I’m praying to have arms open to catch every run and jump I can, and to run full-force, leap without regard, and to twirl around singing, “Take my picture! I’m a princess!”

Vanna, I'd Like to Buy a Mazda

Today was finally the day…

There was bouncing, squealing, happy dancing and a long, long, long outburst of worship, gratitude and honor on a coffee date with Jesus.

Today…

For the first time ever…

On the opposite side of the road…

With a manual transmission…

I bought my very own car!

Paid in full by the loving and generous donations of my Family in the Body of Christ.

LOOK!

Look at her in all her shining blue beauty! Now accepting suggestions for her name! 

My brothers Stan and Lennon spent Friday clearing out grass and making my very own parking space close to my cottage. So awesome.

Today changed everything. I was speechless (besides all the squealing) until finally, these words came out.

Lord,

I commend this car to You.

A gift from You to glorify You.

Let it be a vehicle of connecting intimately.

Let those four wheels and that beautiful, shiny blue body chauffeur love into families and relationships.

Make this place – South Africa – feel like home… not in the comfortable, modern-day conveniences way… But in a way that reflects the family heart of the Trinity.
Let this gift give me a freedom to- perspective rather than a freedom from- outlook. It’s not just about being free from being the girl always looking for a ride to the grocery or water store, or from being “trapped” on a base out of walking distance to anything except, well, more trees.

It’s about freedom to encourage, visit, host, respond, prepare, give.

Lord, I commend this car to Your glory.

Let it be a car filled with joy, family, dance and worship.

I feel delighted that you care about my details, my daily needs, and even went above and beyond “needs” to provide comfort and luxury.

Today, I’m fascinated, delighted and overwhelmed by the set of keys and a more permanent feeling of living here, but today my praises are not for treasures on this earth.

Every time I sit in that car, let me give thanks for Your intimate provision. An act of grace. A daddy delighting in His daughter with a beautiful gift – a gift hand-delivered by the Holy Spirit working through the Body of Christ.

Freely you have given this car to me, Lord, and freely I give it back to You to be used for Your glory… and so, so, so many dance parties.

Aaaaaamen!

Thank you for celebrating with me!

Now please... if you have a car... next time you get in it, do a little happy dance with me and praise God for the ways He knows you and for the things He's given you so freely.

It Does A Body Good

With a title like that you can only be thinking of two things...

MILK and DANCING!?!

Right?

Almost a week since I saw Lifa, and the deliriously happy grin has been wiped off my face and replaced with a seemingly bottomless longing to be close to family - to him, to my mom, my sister, my NaNa, my cousins... everyone. My cottage has felt so much more empty in the past week as I wait "patiently" for God in a million different areas. I've been praying and praying, trying to live in the Truth that it's only and completely about holiness. It's about basking in His presence above and beyond any list of prayer requests and even more than how much I love Lifa...  And that's a lot! 

I've felt myself turn inward and wrestle with, and sometimes even wallow in loneliness. A crazy aftershock after the showering of love and family last Friday.

SO, I walked into a perfect surprise at Dwaleni today. There was a special TB awareness event at the clinic, so the feeding changed venues so the children and workers could be at the event. After a long day of sitting quietly in school, the students were expected to sit quietly and listen to talk about TB. So every 15 minutes or so, when they just got too antsy, the DJ (Why wouldn't there be a DJ?) would play a 15 second dance party.

It was perfect. And these kids can dance.

And then when it was feeding time, the kids got a great surprise - fresh milk! A rare and delicious treat some savored and stared at, while others gulped down right away.

And as those bones were fortified with the good stuff, the dance party really took off!

Just what the doctor ordered...

Milk Moustaches and Dance Parties.

It REALLY does do a body... and a heart... good. 

Believing in What's Bigger and Better

We prayed. We fasted. We came together in the name of family.

We believed BIG things for the Kingdom of God, for Lifa and for me.

The “WE” part made everything better. The “WE” praying from opposite ends of world, sending us off in prayer from base, and in a truck with me for 8 hours today. WE interceded and asked for more from God than we could expect or understand.

Well…

You know how HE is…

BIGGER AND BETTER than that!

I was floored, delighted and overwhelmed by His presence and provision on the 4-hour car ride to meet Lifa’s father.
I was beside myself when we picked him up from work… he looks like Lifa. I could almost feel Lifa by being in such close proximity to his lineage. This was a big deal! I was trembling. I wanted to stare. To touch him. To hug him. Instead, to be culturally appropriate, I avoided eye contact and made “I’m-About-To-Explode!!!” faces to my friend Mzwandile on my other side.

Ready for the bigger and better part!?!

ARE YOU!?!

LIFA WAS THERE!!!!!

I had put every ounce of effort I had in me assuring myself that today was not the day I would see Lifa. His father said that he was staying at a granny’s house far from him, so we were just going to meet and start relationship with the dad.

HE WAS THERE!

I ran! I bawled. Right there in the middle of the crowd.
Lifa was calm, quiet, shell-shocked. After four months of transitions and four months of not being oogled over and kissed at every waking moment, he’s not as expressive or “sparkly-eyed” as he was before I left for the States in December.

His come-back won’t take long though!

I couldn’t control the tears or the love that came pouring out of me. Everyone in the room felt it. Especially Lifa, who clung to me speechlessly, and his father, who kept a delighted eye on us – noticing the way Lifa looked at me.

I shared my Lifa books – and the father had to cover his face to hide his own emotions. As I shared gifts, clothes, food and hugs, Pastor Sthembiso shared my heart for Lifa to Lifa’s father in SiSwati.

You prayed it into existence. Lifa’s father, Jobulani, felt so loved that we made the drive to see him and Lifa. He was overwhelmed by gratitude. He and Lifa have lived a swinging door lifestyle since Lifa was abandoned by his mother at 7 months, always moving in and out of new houses and new communities. The roots he could feel in our love meant something bigger to him. The roots spoke family. Your prayers were heard.

Today I hit every emotion on the charts… and was so very loved by the family all around me here as they allowed me to cry and hurt when I had to say goodbye and then celebrated with me when I was ready to cheer.

But even more important than my emotional Ricther Scale is the significance in today. 
Providence and promises came alive today. 
Your words brought to life by His Spirit. Thank you, family.



Lifa’s father is going to talk to his extended family for approval, and then we are praying that Lifa can come stay with me for a few days after Easter.

When Pastor shared my heart for Lifa, he told Lifa’s father that I was willing and would be honored to care for Lifa in my home.

We put it out there.

And we’ll pray.

We’ll pray that God keeps doing that Bigger and Better thing He’s so good at. And family love gets bigger and better for Jobulani, starting at the roots rather than the fruit. We’ll pray that Jobulani and I both see the most loving thing for Lifa and for himself and can take an obedient role in God’s Bigger and Better plans.

I touched him. I kissed him. I loved on him. I had a lap full of him. TODAY.
It’s surreal. It’s bigger and better than anything I could have imagined.


I believe in the Bigger and Better, and can’t wait to see what’s next!

A conversation with Corinthians

If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.

If I have the gift of prophesy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.

If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

I don’t want to go through the motions… not of a fast, not as a leading character in an exciting story, and not from what visitors have called “the front lines” in Africa’s orphan crisis… 

Not without the REAL Truth. Not without love.

And not just any love. REAL love. Pure love. Your love.

 Love is patient, love is kind.

It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is not rude, it is not self-seeking,

It is not easily angered, it keeps no records of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

I’m not capable of this kind of love by my own strength.

On most days, I try to be. But it’s the days when I admit I need YOU to be love in me and through me that I really experience loving kindness, protecting, trusting, hoping, persevering and rejoicing in truth. That’s what I want to live in. To believe in. To live by.

That’s the love I want to experience fully and give fully.

That’s the love I want Lifa to be saturated with. And for his father to be washed clean with. And to proclaim and speak over every orphan I kiss in Mbonisweni today.

Take all the “me” parts out and replace it with love. Your love. 

Love never fails.

You said it. Your words. Your promises. I’m holding onto that.

 Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

Show us more. Today. 

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. (1 Corinthians 13)

You wrote the definition. You are the existence of it. You know love. You are love. I’m left confused and dumbstruck… repeatedly reminded and devastated that nothing on earth is a promise.

But love never fails. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Even if it’s not in the ways I want to see it. Not how I would have written the story. I don’t want to be a clanging cymbal.

It’s worth it… You’re worth it… to live for and by Your love. Nothing on this earth is a promise. But everything You say is.

You work for the good of those who love you. (Romans 8:28)

It was unbearably painful to adopt me, but You said it was worth it. Even on the days when I cling to earth rules instead of Your Truths.

My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me. (Psalm 63:8)

Today, people around the world are joining in 3 days of fasting for a movement of love, family restoration and reconciliation. We are clinging to the promise and feasting on the Truth: We’ve been given the full inheritance of love that far surpasses broken promises on earth.

Uphold us, Lord. Work for the good of those who love you. Our souls cling to you.

The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still. (Exodus 14:14)

For more information about the 3 day fast, email me at kacychaffin@gmail.com

A Quiet Day on Base and I Suddenly Become a Verbal Processor

Ok… I’m obsessed. After stumbling across the Christian Alliance for Orphans blog, I found – and devoured – the book Reclaiming Adoption: Missional Living Through the Rediscovering of Abba Father. I loved it! I felt compelled to respond to it here – with my people.

We can’t make things better. It was already perfect.

We can’t earn our keep. Jesus already died for that.

God knew all of us – even the parts that hurt - before we even existed. And it was worth the cost for Him from the very beginning. He wanted the fullness of us enjoying the fullness of Him.

Mmmmhmmm… Did you feel that? It feels better than a sno-cone on a summer day. Even better than a running, leaping Lifa hug.

The fullness of God and adoption are not selective. They are the gospel.

God, am I really living like I want this very Fullness for the orphaned and vulnerable children I encounter every day? I mean, the same fullness I want for myself?

THAT level of intimacy, being THAT known, feeling THAT celebrated?

All the best things in Life – Kingdom things - apply first to the last.

Orphans desperate for all kinds of nourishment at feedings in Africa or those who feel orphaned through isolation and estrangement in America’s hustle and bustle.

Widows raising their children’s children from a shack or widows desperate to feel some sort of presence from an empty bed and tear-soaked pillow.

The sick who don’t dare mention their status and are callused from years of being deemed untouchable or the institutionalized, socially-labeled who have never known or can’t remember what it feels like to be respected. 

The criminals on the cross or the ones in the county jail.

That homeless guy on the street you pass every day on the way to work – What was his name again? I wonder if he has a family.

Do I really love them with all of me like He loves me with all of Him?

The least of these will be first.

I can’t help but think of Lifa, the very definition of “the least of these” when I met him over a year ago. God has put a new name on that 3-year old picture of the Kingdom: His Greatness.

We’ve all been estranged from our Father and the perfection communion of Family: The Father, Son and Holy Spirit. And we have all been redeemed by that cross, that empty tomb and that sinless sacrifice we celebrate with new dresses and ties at the Easter sunrise service.

Just like in the Prodigal Son (Luke 15), our Daddy is waiting for us and hikes up His robe to come running to us as soon as we’re ready to come home and take our place at the dinner table… plentifully set every night, just in case.

Adoption has always been the master plan. If you haven’t yet, come home.

If you have, rest in it. Live it up! Feast on the riches of your inheritance! You are chosen and dearly loved. You belong.

We can’t come home to our very own spot at the dinner table, set by Perfect Love – and feel like a foreigner. There’s no holy etiquette except to eat like you live there. Don’t worry about which fork to use first. I’m pretty sure in Heaven we’ll just eat with our hands anyway.

Before we ever existed, the Family had perfect love and perfect intimacy. There never was and never has been room for it to get better. He’s not asking us to come make it better, to do the dishes, or to do anything at all. He just WANTS us. HE doesn’t need us. He WANTS us.

He calls us WORTHY and LOVED.

We’ve got to get this part first.

I have to get this part first.

I’m learning. I think I’ll always be learning.

If I live like an orphan, how can I extend the love and peace that comes with belonging in the Family of God?

I’m on a mission… to live like a child! His Beloved child made worthy and called valuable.

I’m on a mission… to love like a child without holding back.

I’m on a mission… to abandon my own mission and live for His.

Pray with me this week. Friday, Pastor Sthembiso, John Shaw (TTH staff), and I are going to meet Lifa’s father, Jobulani, for the first time! Lifa won’t be there, but our hope is to begin building a relationship with him that welcomes him into this story of Reconciliation and Adoption that God’s been authoring since before time ever began.

Also, pray for the details and that God will handle the red tape with us. It’s what He does anyway – so I’m calling faithfully on the prayers of His children to join in:

1. Pray for patience and efficiency as we are waiting on a donation – already well on it’s way – to make it to our USA bank account and transferred to our SA account to BUY A CAR that we can take to visit Lifa’s father.

2. Pray for registration details of the car and the roadworthy test to come easily without needing a 3 year visa finalized and without any unexpected hold-ups along the way.

3. Pray that I am able to register car and then turn in my application for my visa by Thursday so I do not have to leave the country again to renew a tourist visa.

I’ll write more details, prayer points, and info about a family fast soon!

Thank you. I love you.